Hi-yaaaa

This week has been fairly quiet:

• Life. I'm very drained this week. Usually, I stand strong until Friday, but on Wednesday I utterly crashed. I call what happened a "karate chop to the neck". Have you seen in the movies when the evildoer hits a person's neck to make them lose consciousness? That's how it feels when I am drained. I couldn't stay awake. I think it's been busy and I got sad news about a college friend, which was a shock to my system. I've mentioned this before, but I've made a lot of mistakes in my relationships by isolating. I wish I had known when I was younger what was truly driving this so I could reassure my friends that I love them very much, but that the isolation was just me processing. When I isolate and run away, it's because I'm overwhelmed. Much like a computer or car shuts down if the system detects that the mechanisms are overheating. But people around me don't know that. I hurt them because of the way I am and I hate it so much. So much unnecessary loss.

• Books. I FINALLY settled on a book this week and was able to finish it. Killers of a Certain Age by Deanna Raybourne. I love funny titles like this (the upcoming sequel will be called Kills Well With Others which made me squeal in delight). It's aptly described as Golden Girls meets James Bond and was a fun read. I felt the romance was a touch tacked on and forced into the narrative, but otherwise, perfection! I started The House in the Cerulean Sea and am enjoying it. It's cozy and I like the author's writing style.

• Creativity. Related to books, I started a thread on ChatGPT to help ease my reading slumps. I'm working with AI to create a system tailored to my reading needs. I am feeding it data from books I have read in the past, and testing out if it will serve as a personalized recommendation engine. My excitement for this lies in the fact that AI is understanding me without the commercial interest that (understandably) drives other recommendation engines to prioritize certain things. I'm also working with AI to see if it's viable to design and build an interface for my engine. This will be an amazing opportunity to use tech to improve my life and organize a project from the ground up. I worry I have technical limitations for implementing the more complex pieces like the DB design and algorithm, but one step at a time! The good thing about AI is that if I proceed with this project I can have it serve as my project manager, writing a timeline and working with me every step of the way.

• Music. I found an awesome song called Dopamine by Madelline. Still into Woke Up by XG too! Otherwise, I've just vibing to chill Bossa Nova lately. There was a jaunty little track on Etrian Odyssey Untold 2 that got me in the mood for cute cafe style bossa nova.

• Movies. I'm still working through my Studio Ghibli collection! I ordered a used copy of The Grave of the Fireflies DVD. Now I'm only missing The Boy and the Heron which will be released next month. I might check out Ocean Waves this weekend since I've not seen it yet. I also have been playing previously watched Ghiblis in the background while I do housework which has been fun!